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Menu: Home UP EDITORIALS Another Linux Laptop More Scumbags Join the EFF Java woes Linux Laptop Die, threads! Welfare Whores I bought it, it's mine. MS Trial Verdict Linux Desktop Letter to Bob Robb MS Myths 1-3 Windows? No, KDE! Benchmarketing 101 Benchmarks Galore! Mindcraft Reality Check Open Source Economics FUD 101 Commoditization Markets & Microsoft Don't Cry for Bill Links Contact Info My Resume My Public Key EMAIL Eric BadTux Portal[et]	Lies, Damned Lies, and Benchmarks Benchmarking has been major news lately. The Linux and Macintosh camps have especially been either upset about other people's benchmarks or touting their latest benchmarks. To comment about these issues, I invited two OS advocates to write their commentary: Captain Penguin: This tuxedoed superhero is never afraid to fly (well, waddle) in pursuit of truth, justice, and really good herring. When he catches ne'er-do-wells (well, one day he might!) he knocks them over with his mighty herring breath, at which point they promptly expire. Mr. Underhill : Like all hobbits, Mr. Underhill is cultured, artistic, and quite devoted to his beloved Macintosh. His Mac is not just a computer, it is an artistic statement. The Comments: First, Captain Penguin commented on the poor performance of the Macintosh on the most important benchmark of all: Subject: Truth: Herring faster than G3! From: Captain Penguin Date: Mon Jun 14 11:52:06 It's the truth, and the only people who deny it are into denial. Mr. Underhill may complain, but the absolute truth is that herring are faster than the Macintosh G3. Why, herring can swim at over 5 miles per hour!! What? You say that the Macintosh G3 can't swim? Hah! That's zero miles per hour. Herring beats it handily! Herring. Yumm. ERRP! Mr. Underhill's Reply: Mr. Underhill was quite put out by Captain Penguin's assertations of the inferiority of his beloved friend and companion, and shot out this rather heated reply: Subject: Re: Truth: Herring faster than G3! From: Mr Underhill Date: Mon Jun 14 12:38:03 I normally consider your posts entertaining and well-informed; however, I must protest this one: The G3 was not equipped with the submersible options, although you conveniently did not mention this in your post. The benchmark was biased against the MAC. Horizontal speed only was considered; if vertical descent was included the MAC would have fared much better. As an aside, in benchmark testing sponsored by Apple, the herring lost functionality at a relatively shallow depth, while the MAC operates just as well under 5000 ft. of saltwater as it does under 10 ft. Sheesh! You Linux guys will do anything to spin benchmark results to suit your needs. Conclusions: There you have it, the full skinny on benchmarking! What? You say that the benchmark chosen does not accurately reflect the proper usage of either herring or Macintoshes? Gosh, I didn't notice (grin).

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Lies, Damned Lies, and Benchmarks

Benchmarking has been major news lately. The Linux and Macintosh camps have especially been either upset about other people's benchmarks or touting their latest benchmarks. To comment about these issues, I invited two OS advocates to write their commentary:

Captain Penguin: This tuxedoed superhero is never afraid to fly (well, waddle) in pursuit of truth, justice, and really good herring. When he catches ne'er-do-wells (well, one day he might!) he knocks them over with his mighty herring breath, at which point they promptly expire.
Mr. Underhill : Like all hobbits, Mr. Underhill is cultured, artistic, and quite devoted to his beloved Macintosh. His Mac is not just a computer, it is an artistic statement.

The Comments:

First, Captain Penguin commented on the poor performance of the Macintosh on the most important benchmark of all:

Subject: Truth: Herring faster than G3!
From: Captain Penguin
Date: Mon Jun 14 11:52:06

It's the truth, and the only people who deny it are into denial. Mr. Underhill may complain, but the absolute truth is that herring are faster than the Macintosh G3. Why, herring can swim at over 5 miles per hour!!

What? You say that the Macintosh G3 can't swim? Hah! That's zero miles per hour. Herring beats it handily!

Herring. Yumm.

ERRP!

Mr. Underhill's Reply:

Mr. Underhill was quite put out by Captain Penguin's assertations of the inferiority of his beloved friend and companion, and shot out this rather heated reply:

Subject: Re: Truth: Herring faster than G3!
From: Mr Underhill
Date: Mon Jun 14 12:38:03

I normally consider your posts entertaining and well-informed; however, I must protest this one:

The G3 was not equipped with the submersible options, although you conveniently did not mention this in your post.
The benchmark was biased against the MAC. Horizontal speed only was considered; if vertical descent was included the MAC would have fared much better. As an aside, in benchmark testing sponsored by Apple, the herring lost functionality at a relatively shallow depth, while the MAC operates just as well under 5000 ft. of saltwater as it does under 10 ft.

Sheesh! You Linux guys will do anything to spin benchmark results to suit your needs.

Conclusions:

There you have it, the full skinny on benchmarking!

What? You say that the benchmark chosen does not accurately reflect the proper usage of either herring or Macintoshes? Gosh, I didn't notice (grin).

Created with PHP 4. Last modified Fri, 06 Dec 2002 10:27:39 -0500.

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Lies, Damned Lies, and Benchmarks

The Comments:

Mr. Underhill's Reply:

Conclusions: